`Silence & sound Did they ever hold each other Tight like us

[Rylee Rose]

We are the RECKLESS, We are the wild YOUTH

tag: Bellamy Blake // words: --- // notes: Bellalee is back y'all !  

Rylee had lost count of how many days it had been since others had left for the mountain. She had started to keep track in the dirt next to her bed, but after a while it just seemed hopeless. Camp Jaha was cold without many of the 100 around. Since the adults had come down, the days went about differently, slower, more managed. She felt even more trapped than she had under Bellamy's rule. At the mere thought of him, her heart ached. Bellamy was in the Mountain. His need to keep everyone safe was an unfortunate yet beautiful trait that he possessed. She hadn't heard any news from him or any of the others and it made her fear for the worst. She and Bellamy had left things on good terms, being the need for the other when the time was necessary. But since had had been gone, she felt an increasing desire to be with him and more than just physically. Her heart broke when she first discovered his plan to leave camp and go to help save the others. Yes of course she wanted them to be safe, but the idea of him being in harms way with no idea what he was walking into scared her half to death. Rylee had ventured out into the Grounder territory. Sure there was much more to be discovered, but the 100 had a better idea of what was out there. They had plans in place for when the toxic rain came. They knew how to survive in the worst conditions. But the Mountain...that was an entirely different beast. She couldn't even begin to imagine what was happening there. They were told when they came down that the Mountain was meant to keep 300 people sustained for 2 years. By the rumors spreading around camp, it became more apparent that that 2 year timeline had been greatly increased. That only made Rylee more anxious. She was sure that with new scientific and technical developments, the Mountain Men were more than capable of creating horrors that she and the others had never seen before. And the thought of her friends....and Bellamy....being in there was enough to drive her mad. Lying on her bed, Rylee stared up and felt her heart aching again. She had no idea if she’d ever see Bellamy….the last time she saw him might be all she has to get her through. She knew they had settled on no feelings, no relationship, just them when they needed to be a “them”. But now…now with him gone she couldn’t help but think if things would have been different if he was still here. She sighed as she pushed herself up off of her bed. She couldn’t keep focusing on it…on him. There was still work to be done around camp. As she was putting on her jacket and boots, she heard talking…yelling from outside her quarters. Pushing back her door she walked out into the light and blinked as the sun shined brightly into her eyes. She looked towards the gate and saw the guards opening the doors. That almost never happened…. Who was out there? She walked towards the entrance and stopped dead in her tracks. It was the others…coming back from the Mountain….but she didn’t see him. She didn’t see his hair or dark eyes…she didn’t see him among the others. She pushed through people, past friends, past enemies, determined to not admit the worst to herself. Where was he… And then she stopped again, her breath caught in her throat. Watching as he said goodbye to a disheveled and determined Clarke. His brown hair matted and yet still tossing in the wind. His clothes torn, but he was there. Standing and alive. She didn’t even have the strength to move."You're alive?" The words fell from her lips barely above a whisper, scared to move, fearing it could all be a dream.  She just stared at him hoping that when he turned around it would in fact be him…. ...that it would be Bellamy…

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[Bellamy Blake]

Tag: Rylee Rose

we did

WHAT WE HAD TO DO

She was gone. Clarke was gone. She left him. She left the. He knew he couldn't see it selfishly, but her leaving had hurt him. More than he had ever thought she would. All the times she had asked him to stay, he had. All that she had asked him to do, he'd done. The one time he needed her, the one action he did to make sure she wouldn't have to endure this alone . . . bit him in the ass. Because she left him to deal with it on his own. The others were here, but it wasn't the same. Bellamy knew he had to put his feelings aside for the betterment of the camp. For to sake of their people. But it was damn hard. Now being forced to deal with everything he had done.

Drowning in the blood of almost a thousand people. Blood that was on his hands. The four days of lacking sleep, drink, and water, along with the decontamination and harvesting process, had left Bellamy weak. Whatever little adrenaline was left, was starting to wear off. But he couldn't collapse just yet. His mind still processing all that had happened. The innocent people he had killed: men, women . . . children. People who trusted him. People who had saved him. And this was the fate he had condemned them to. Images of them would haunt him for some time to come, so right now, sleep, rest, was not an option. He would not seek out either, because he needed distraction.

Yet, he was still standing there, turning around to walk through the gates, knowing that she would not return in this moment. He paused however when he saw Rylee, shock evident on her features. He ceased movements and stared at her, not even realizing that he was now standing directly in front of her. She was alive. Safe. And . . . the ease he felt when looking at her was, refreshing. For he could see her without thinking of all he had done to save her. She hadn't been in Mount Weather. He didn't have to kill any of them for her. And that, made him feel a strange sense of relief. One he didn't deserve, for breathing, enduring, that would be his greatest punishment of all.

Yet the emotionally vulnerable state he was in controlled his next actions. His mind a gaze, the weakened state starting to catch up on him and take a toll. Lack of basic necessities after days in Mount Weather, and yet, he had enough strength to reach out and wrap his arms around her, pulling her close. He lowered his head a little, nestling it in the crook of her neck, as if this . . . as if she was the only saving grace left. Romantic relationships had never been something he'd been able to invest in.

On the Ark it had been because of his responsibility to his family. On the ground it had been because of his responsibility to the 100, and other Arkers. But now . . . he selfishly basked in the comfort that the arms of someone he deeply cared about could bring him. He was tired of pushing aside desires and the need for this kind of comfort. He wasn't worthy of it, now less than ever. But if he was to keep standing, to keep moving, to keep, breathing . . . then the need for the woman before him, was more clear than ever.

[Rylee Rose]

We are the RECKLESS, We are the wild YOUTH

tag: Bellamy Blake // // notes: the sweetness is killing me

Rylee felt her heart skip a beat when the man before her turned around and it was in fact Bellamy. Her mind at ease at the thought of him being alive and finally back at camp. She didn’t know where things had been left between them other than their non existent relationship with relationship tendencies, but all she cared about was that he was safe and home. But she still couldn’t move. Afraid he would disappear and she would wake up from a horrible nightmare alone in her bed for another night, missing him. And then she felt him. He pulled her into his arms, against his body and she felt her own shake with a not only a shiver, but small tears that escaped her eyes. She closed her eyes, capturing the tears as he brought his face against her neck. She laughed softly through the tears and ran her hand through his hair gently. “You…you came back alive…” She whispered. “I-I thought I’d never see you again…touch you again…hear your voice, your laugh.. see your smile” She didn’t dare open her eyes and let this moment fade. To be in his arms again was something she had never expected to feel again, never mind be the first thing he reached for after days in the Mountain. Rylee opened her eyes and lifted her head, taking his face between her hands. Looking into his eyes, she smiled. “I missed you…” She ran her hand through his hair again. “I know we said no feelings….but I missed you.” She whispered. He looked like he had been through so much pain and she wanted to take care of him as best she could. But was this all just a daze where he would push away from her once she took care of him? Or was this really him? She wasn’t sure. She wanted nothing more than to kiss him and be in his arms as long as she could but the ball was in his court now. She wouldn't know where they stood until he made the decision, because she knew how she felt.  She could feel some eyes on the couple from camp. Others were probably taken aback by this sheer showing of affection by the infamous Bellamy Blake. But Rylee didn’t care. All she had wanted since the day he had left was to be back with him and here he was. Her heart was racing and she didn’t want it to stop. Having him here meant she could finally sleep at night. Having him here meant she could stop worrying. She didn’t care if he ended up not wanting her. None of that mattered as long as he was alive…that was what mattered to her.

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[Bellamy Blake]

Tag: Rylee Rose

we did

WHAT WE HAD TO DO

Bellamy continued to hold Rylee in his arms, never wanting his moment to fade. Wanting to pretend that nothing else ceased to exist. No more killing. No more fighting. Just . . . a chance to live, rather than to survive. But reality had its way of crashing back onto them. She spoke of how he came back alive, and he wondered how true that was. Yet, being in her arms, made him feel alive. As alive as he was able to be considering everything he had done.

His heart swelled with emotion, both good and bad, hearing her list off what she had thought she'd never see again. He wanted to be all that for her; a figure that could draw smiles from her with one of his own. A person to laugh with. Just, anything and everything she needed. Because he felt like he needed her. And before, while it may not have been possible, he was tired of fighting. Which included being tired of fighting his emotions. He basked in the warm comfort of her hands upon his cheek as she spoke words that he mutually felt.

"I missed you too," he returned in a quiet voice, but one holding the utmost sincerity. He had missed her, more than he thought possible. The acknowledgement of what had been previously agreed upon, causing him to slightly clench his jaw. Wanting to full out reject those previously set terms. But, it was not a conversation to be had in public. Not like this. He looked at her, emotion in his face, a mix of pain of everything . . . but also relief. To be with her. The surrounding sounds pulled him ot of this trance of comfort as he looked around for a moment.

He needed to help the others, and yet, couldn't quite tear hmself from her arms quite yet. He leaned forward, tilting his head down as he rested his cheek against hers, his lips near her ear so he could speak in a low voice, but audible enough for her and only her to hear. "I missed you so much, Rylee." It wasn't exactly what he wanted to say, but it was what came out . . . hoping that she understood there was more to his words.

Ones that were no longer dismissive of keeping their arrangements as friends or, however they had defined it. He placed a light kiss on her cheek as he drew his head back to look at her. "Are you ok? Everything here ok?" He wanted to make sure that she was, for it was easier to focus on her well being and that of the others rather than his own. And, it was a sincere concern. Wanting to make sure she was alright where he hadn't been here to see it for himself.

[Rylee Rose]

We are the RECKLESS, We are the wild YOUTH

tag: Bellamy Blake // words: --- // notes: this is beautiful

Rylee still wasn’t quite sure that this was real. She had had nightmares since the day the others left and every single one ended in him dead or coming back and her then promptly waking up only to realize it hadn’t been true. But she knew this had to be real. He was here…he was talking to her…holding her. This was far beyond any nightmare she had had before. She was just too afraid of reality to believe it. His returned words brought her from her thoughts. She smiled at the thought of him missing her too. She hadn’t realized he was capable of that, at least with her. With Octavia and Clarke definitely, but her? Never crossed her mind. She saw the tension build in his jaw as thoughts ran through his head. Something of a cross between a smile and a frown crossed her features as she stroked his cheek gently with her thumb, wanting him to relax. She knew he had a lot to deal with being back here…but she was still beyond herself that he had been happy to see her. It was the last thing she had expected. As Bellamy leaned his face towards hers, she closed her eyes feeling his cheek next to her own. She smiled at the warmth his body gave hers as it covered her small form. When he repeated the words of missing her and actually said her name, another slight chill ran down her spine. She tightened her arms around him for only a moment giving him another squeeze to acknowledge his thoughts. She knew that saying any of this was a lot for him to admit. She wasn’t asking for an explanation, she never did and never would. But she knew that once they settled down from this excitement of being back home, the two of them would be able to talk…and maybe finally acknowledge one another’s feelings…because Rylee knew she had them…and she had a feeling that Bellamy was trying to tell her something now…but she wouldn’t think too much into it. When his lips met her cheek as he pulled away, she smiled gently and opened her eyes as his voice rang through her ears again. Rylee sighed and turned around his arms slightly to look back at camp. “The Ark is destroyed…Jaha, the council, parents other kids…they were all sent down, but you knew that" She redirected her thoughts. "….some survived….some didn’t...some we haven't found.” Rylee said that with a note of sadness in her voice as she looked at Alpha station that had now become their new home.  “I haven’t found my dad yet…and I’m afraid to look for him…or even ask about him.” She shook the thought from her head and turned to face him. “But everyone is okay…so far.” She laughed gently and then looked into his eyes again. "Jaha left...and Abby is the new Chancellor, you probably already know that too....but where Jaha went...I'm not sure. He seemed worried when he left..but things haven't changed much for us yet." She shrugged. Jaha being gone was probably a good thing for Bellamy. “I have barely slept…but I don’t think that will be a problem anymore.” She spoke softly, feeling like she was rambling. Bellamy knew most of what had happened in camp but she just felt like she had to keep talking to him, again afraid to jinx herself and have him disappear before her very eyes. She knew that as long as he was safe in camp, her nightmares would go away…that’s all she wanted…all she needed…was Bellamy safe. "Are you okay?"

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