Broken

[cherry1]

It was just another day for Raven. Gena was out with a team getting supplies from Mount Weather so nobody was here to talk her down. She had tried, really tried to just ignore the pain and get some sleep but it was impossible. Especially alone at night when there was nothing to distract her, it’s all there was. All that she had left. It’s why she’d ended up here in the middle of the night, with free reign of Gena’s assortment of booze. Raven would apologise later but for now, it was the only sure fire way she could think of to numb the pain. And not just the pain in her leg.

It was getting harder to deal with, but she refused to have anybody touch her. Not even Abby. Raven deserved this, it was her burden to bare after the atrocities she’d committed. The blood on her hands. Their faces visited her at night, in her nightmares to forever haunt her and remind her that she was far from innocent. The grounders at the dropship, her mother…Finn. She destroyed everything she touched. It’s why Raven chose to be alone and pushed everyone away. She couldn’t bare to darken their light. Half a bottle into this endeavour, Raven gave up on using a glass. Instead just taking swigs straight from Monty’s special moonshine. Wincing at the bitter taste, as it burned down her throat. The pain offering the perfect distraction.

As she glanced at the opening to the hanger, Raven could have sworn she’d caught a glimpse of one John Murphy. It wouldn’t be the first time his face haunted her, but usually she’d need to be asleep for that to happen. What was in this stuff? It must have been strong. “Hey Murphy.” She shouted at no one in particular, swaying slightly at standing up too fast. “You here for more target practice?” Sitting back down, Raven took another swig of her drink. Chuckling at how ridiculous she must look talking to her own imagination. 

Tag: John Murphy

[John Murphy]

Since he'd abandoned Jaha and the quest for his probable make-believe city of light and returned to camp, Murphy had mostly stayed out of the way. In part, because he didn't want much to do with most of the other Arkers for a while. It wasn't as though he felt any deep connection with them, at least that wasn't how he saw it. Only that he was in the best place for him right now. If that changed, he could always leave again and perhaps he would reach a point where it was necessary. For now he'd stick around, albeit inconspicuously.

Despite the half-willing, half-imposed separation from the others, there was a part of him that craved some company at times, tonight being one of those. Although he wasn't ready to admit that and so wouldn't actively seek it out. Just as well it was late when he decided to wander the Ark. Less chance of running into anybody he might actually bother to linger around. He'd be fine alone. Resigned to the fact for now Murphy headed past the entrance to the Hangar along his way, sparing a glance to see who might be inside though he had no intention of stopping. Catching sight of Raven was more reason to head elsewhere, the other being one of those least likely to favor Murphy's company. Now or ever. 

He halted as Raven called out his name, even though he'd passed out of view from where she sat, catching the subtle telltale slur in her voice. Leave it alone. Just keep on going. Ignore her. Not likely. Her comment tugging at him to throw her a response, he backed up to bring himself to the entrance, swinging to face her as he took a few steps inside. "Only one taking shots right now is you, Raven."

Tag: cherry1

[cherry1]

Raven froze for a moment when she heard someone respond to her. Not just anyone. She’d recognise his voice anywhere. It was Murphy. And it had been so clear, and such a biting remark that it couldn’t have just been her imagination. It had to be the real deal. He was here. The realisation sobered her up. Slightly. As soon as he walked into the light her suspicions were confirmed. The bastard had returned. “Admiring your handiwork?” She asked looking down at the brace around her bum leg. The leg she couldn’t properly use because of the man standing barely a few feet away from her.

She wasn’t usually this bitter, choosing to bury herself in work rather than actually face her feelings. But tonight was a particularly bad night for her. The chronic pain radiating from her hip especially unbearable. While she had been content in just drowning herself in booze for one night and beating herself up about all her past mistakes, Murphy’s sudden appearance offered an interesting alternative. Raven would much prefer to take her anger out on him rather than herself. And well he’d just have to accept that he’d come back to the wrong place at an especially wrong time.

“Come on Murphy, I’m just playing around,” but her tone was about as far from playful as you could get. The expression on her face lined with bitterness and disdain. “Here have a drink, no hard feelings I promise.” She mockingly crossed her fingers and smirked, almost laughing at the ridiculousness of the image of her and Murphy sharing drinks and stories. After everything he’d done to her. Everything he’d taken. Raven refused to believe she was actually keeping him here because of how desperately lonely she was, rather than her masterplan to take out all her pent up rage on him. No, he needed to feel regret. And goddamit she would make sure of that.

Tag: John Murphy

[John Murphy]

A drunken Raven. Perfect. As if she ever needed any liquid courage to say exactly what she thought. Still, she wasn't the only one who was all for speaking their mind. Murphy would give as good as he got if necessary, and it was looking to be a potential snapping of comments back at one another right now. Even so, once she drew attention to the brace on her leg he took a moment to look it over. He hadn't intended on shooting Raven, but in all honesty if he had known it to be her under the dropship floor instead of Octavia as he'd suspected, he likely would have still pulled the trigger. At the time, he was focused on one motivation and Raven had gotten in the way.

It didn't mean he was proud of it. Murphy had nothing against her prior to the event and hell, he'd even apologized eventually. Albeit, in a somewhat hostile way. A lot of good it did, since she'd so eagerly tried to hand him over to the grounders in place of her oh-so-innocent-boyfriend. Ex-boyfriend. So maybe that made them even. He shot her. She tricked him. Maybe they didn't quite balance out in a traditional sense but he'd believed her when she asked for his help. And had offered it. So... even. Bygones.

The invitation to join her for a drink, mocking as it was, had his gaze shifting to the alcohol. Murphy knew she would sooner dump it on his head than share it, and he wasn't entertaining the idea. Regardless, he lingered taking a couple of steps her way before he halted once more, hands pushing into his pockets. A smirk offered along with his mordant reply, though the expression lacked any humor. "Well... I did say sorry." It was no doubt a bad idea to provoke her, but she had instigated it.

Tag: cherry1