Mutual Understanding

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Mopping floors was not one of the highlights of his life, that was for sure. Murphy scowled as he run out the mop and set it down on the floor of the corridor, cleaning up the residual dirt from hundreds of boots trampling across it the past few days. Just because he had struck that Grounder bastard for accusing him of not doing anything at Tondc and telling him he was going to burn like Finn had. Murphy knew he had a temper but he wasn’t going to apologize for his actions. Kane had tried to get him to apologize to the Grounder but that was the last thing Murphy was going to do. It had quickly erupted into a gigantic fight with everyone throwing punches. Murphy had a slightly blackened eye and a cut on his lip to prove it. Once the fight had been broken up, Murphy had been sent off to work detail and now here he was, playing the role of janitor and cleaning up after everyone’s mess.

Tondc was forever going to be a sore spot for him and it wasn’t like he hadn’t tried. If he had tried any harder, he would have had to knock out Finn and then he would have been blamed for the entire massacre, knowing his luck. Seeing Finn freak out like that had terrified Murphy, he couldn’t lie about that. It still haunted him days later. Part of him wanted to try and fit in back here at camp, to do his part and pull duties where they needed him, but the other part of him wondered if there was really any point. Would they honestly accept him? Sure, they had been pardoned for their crimes up on the Ark and down here on the ground, but he still didn’t feel like he belonged. He had screwed up, he knew that, but he had also made an effort to do better. Hell, he had saved Bellamy and that girl’s life, and he didn’t have to but he had held on with all of his strength when the rope had broken.

With a sigh, the scowl melting from his features, Murphy soaked the mop again, twisted it out, and moved to another section of the floor. It was amazing how much dirt could be accumulated within the span of a day. At least this camp was more fortified than their old camp back at the drop ship. Having the electrified fence gave him some sense of security but he wondered how long even that would last. The fact that they were looking at allying themselves with the Grounders didn’t sit well with him in the least but what could he do? Could they really count on those people to help them against the Mountain Men? What was so terrifying about the people in Mount Weather anyways? Murphy wasn’t privy to a lot of information, he knew that, but he still had tons of questions and there wasn’t really anyone who could answer.

Clarke Griffin

[Clarke Griffin]

It was getting harder by the hour. It was a heavier burden to carry with every passing minute. She had to juggle an alliance, had to try and keep her people in line towards the Grounders and make them eventually understand how to stay in line with them. But on top of it all Clarke Griffin hadn’t had a single moment to reflect on the things that happened. She had started seeing things, visions of a person long dead. Logically she knew she had to kill him. He would have suffered longer and worse than her killing him instantly. Clarke had operated with precision that day she killed Finn, because she could, because she had to. But it still felt like there was blood on her hands and however she tried, she could not wash it off. They were clean, logically, but emotionally this was an entirely different story. Finn was dead and she was forced to forge an alliance with the people who wanted his death. Right now she just needed a moment, a small moment away from everyone who could potentially want something from her. 

The perfect room for it presented itself in the form of the one room where Murphy was cleaning. She knew she could just sit there, out of his way and people would never expect her there, because why would Clarke seek his company? She wasn’t, really, which was the entire point of it. Carefully avoiding the spots he already cleaned in, Clarke took a seat and placed it in a corner. She sat on it crossed legged, so she would be out of his way. Maybe she should say something, though.

“If I’m in your way, tell me. I’ll go then.” Somewhere else, not that she thought she could find a better, more effective spot. She just wanted a little break.

@murphy

[Deleted]

It was only a few days that he’d have work detail but it still pissed him off. It wasn’t his fault but again, he was the one who was punished. Should he have struck that Grounder? Maybe not, but it had been well deserved. The bastard wasn’t going to get away with shaming him in public, especially when it had been something out of Murphy’s control. As always, he had let his fists do the talking but when was that anything different than his usual? Murphy had been getting into fights for years, preferring to make people fear him rather than befriend them. The friend thing had never worked in his favor and everyone had always betrayed him in the end, so why not make them fear him and thus leave him alone?

He supposed he hadn’t always been someone who preferred to fight, he mused as he continued to mop up the floor. Once he finished that area of the floor, he began to straighten the items on the storage shelves, making it easier to find things. It had honestly started after his mother began drinking. He had had to take out his frustrations on someone, and those who were weaker than him had unfortunately been the target of his rage. Funnily enough, it hadn’t been a fight that had stuck him in the Sky Box but rather stealing some extra rations to help some of the less fortunate. Being stuck in that Sky Box for years had taken its toll on him and even now, being completely alone bothered him. Maybe he would have ended up differently if his parents had lived and he had had better social interactions, but there wasn’t much he could do about that now.

Murphy didn’t see Clarke enter since his back was to the entrance when she slipped in. It wasn’t until she spoke that he paused in his work to glance over at her. Part of him wanted to just tell her to get lost but honestly, what was the point? She wasn’t bothering him, she wasn’t in the way, and it was clear she was trying to get away from things so who was he to deny her? Things had definitely changed as of late and Murphy found that he felt less hostile towards the other delinquents, though he wasn’t sure he’d ever truly ‘fit’ in with them nor did he necessarily want to. Yet what else was he supposed to do? This was his home now and he sure as hell wasn’t going to go outside of that fence to try and fend for himself. Sure he was a survivor and he had managed to survive a hell of a lot so far, but why tempt fate?

“Hiding from your problems never got anyone anywhere,” he said calmly as he began mopping another part of the floor. “What’d you do this time?” There wasn’t hostility in his voice but more curious than anything. He wasn’t surprised that she seemed worn down. They all did at this point, after everything they had been dealing with. Things were never going to be easy and they had a lot to prep for, not to mention all the unknowns out there such as the Mountain Men, the upcoming winter, and Mount Weather for starters. “If you’re looking for a shoulder to cry on, you’d probably have more luck with Bellamy.” He didn’t mention Finn. The other’s death had affected them all, although Murphy would never admit that it had affected him. Finn’s death meant any of them could be killed, that if they slipped up even a little, and the Grounders called for blood, they’d be subjected to that torture. There was no way he’d suffer through that again.

Clarke Griffin

[Clarke Griffin]

Clarke hadn’t expected words like those from Murphy. Why would she? They barely talked, how would she know there was some form of wisdom and cleverness in there? She knew he was blunt, which was probably why he told her hiding never got anyone anywhere. He was right. Hiding would not get anything done, but she simply needed it. Everyone was expecting something from her. She felt their eyes on her, she felt the weight of every decision on her shoulder, the weight of this entire operation. The adults wouldn’t take charge, wouldn’t make the hard decisions, so it was up to her, to them. And now it looked like Bellamy might be the one paying the price. Even that caught up with her now. She might have killed him with her decision. Maybe he was already dead, she would not know until he found a way to check in with them. Maybe he never made it to Mount Weather and his corpse was out there, burnt by acid fog. That was on her as well. Wells, Finn, now Bellamy, they might all be on her and more people. She did this.

“Bellamy is gone.” She whispered. It was the only answer she had to all of it. Bellamy in danger was what she did, what made her hide and what prevented her from seeking comfort with that man. She didn’t know where else to turn to or where else to cope with what she did. She needed him to call in, as soon as possible, so she could rest, somehow. She needed to be able to think clearly without fearing for him and the others the entire time. Once he was in and save, their friends were safe, right? At least safer.

@murphy

[Deleted]

“It’s Bellamy. You really think he’s going to go down without a fight? He’s a stubborn bastard. He’ll make it through,” he said with a glance in her direction before he began to mop another area of the floor. He didn’t say it with malice, but simply matter of factly. There wasn’t any hate towards Bellamy anymore, hell, he didn’t really hate most of them. There wasn’t any point. He just minded his own business and stayed out of their way. Minimal conversations, enough that he didn’t seem like a total recluse, but he continued to be wary of what they might do. It seemed like only yesterday that Raven had been screaming his name, for him to be taken instead of Finn when the Grounders had come for blood, even after they had seemingly come to an understanding in the drop ship. He had meant it when he had said he hadn’t been trying to shoot her. True, he had thought it had been Octavia instead, but regardless, it was just another example of why he didn’t exactly have the best faith in how the others would treat him in the future.

Murphy would do his duty and then who knew what. Would he end up going to Mount Weather with the rescue team? Or stay here and help guard the camp? He finished mopping the remainder of the floor and propped the mop up against a nearby wall. Onto the next task, which meant cleaning the stack of weapons sitting in a pile near the door. Menial duty meant for those who didn’t have much use otherwise, but that was why it was work detail and not something people necessarily volunteered for. He’d much rather be outside doing anything else but he didn’t have a choice. Lashings were an alternative punishment since they couldn’t really float anyone here, and he didn’t need any more scars to add to the mess on his back.

“I’m surprised you haven’t gone after him already,” he said, glancing at Clarke before beginning to disassemble the weapons on the table in front of him. Cleaning the various parts was almost soothing in a way, and he felt more relaxed as he settled into a routine. He still didn’t know why she had come here or stayed for that matter, especially since he was there. She had made it pretty clear the last time he had been in her vicinity that she wanted nothing to do with him. “You know, if you’re just going to sit around moping or whatever, you could at least do something useful,” he said with a wave of his hand towards the remaining guns. It wasn’t meant to be a cutting remark. It’d be a good distraction and it seemed that was something she really needed at that point. That, and it also meant he’d finish the work detail early for today and he could get out of this hole sooner.

Clarke Griffin

[Clarke Griffin]

“And if the odds are wrong, he will still go down, kicking and screaming or not.” Murphy was right. Bellamy would fight, tooth and nail to survive and to protect the others. He was their joker in so many ways, but he was still only human. If they were unlucky he would get discovered. If they got unlucky she really sent him to his death. And what then? What would she do? Their plan stood and fell with Bellamys success. There was no way for them to enter the mountain if he could not disable the defense systems from the inside. There was no way for them to succeed if whoever they had inside wasn’t mobilized and ready to help them strike. Not to mention she knew know that staying there had been a foolish idea from the others. If only they had listened to her. Then again maybe that would have resulted in all of their deaths.

“Why? If I did, I’d sign his death sentence. Imagine me going there for him. They’d kill him as soon as they make the connection. I can’t go after him, even if I want to.” Maybe her weakness had been what she needed. Maybe she should have listened to that. Maybe she should have listened to her weakness, but looking back didn’t help anything. She had to deal with the worry in her heart and the looks from the others. She was dealing with the Grounders like she was the single leader of their people. But if they didn’t want to do what had to be done, was it her fault? Certainly not. Clarke just had to adjust to whatever was thrown at her. 

“You really want to give me guns while being in the same room with me?” Did he trust her with him or what was going on there. Though Clarke found that this was an interesting offer indeed. She wouldn’t have to think about strategies and other things while doing something with her hands. Maybe her mind would not wander then. But then there was the whole problem that she did not know how to clean a gun. Bellamy taught her how to shoot, but not how to clean it.

@murphy