Don't Make Me Wait Forever

[blake]

Octavia Blake

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Don't make me wait forever.

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Octavia turned the corner int he cave and came to a stop. The door. They had found it! She walked over to it slowly and pulled at the handle but it didn't budge. She knew that this didn't mean that Bell was dead, but only that he needed more time. So she would wait. And wait she did. For what felt like forever. O sat down on a rock not far from the door, and waited. She wasn't alone. Thankfully Indra and Jackson were here with her. Indra had been training O how to fight, and survive--and Jackson . . . he had become a friend she hadn't expected. She liked how simple things were with him. Right now she needed that. Especially after Lincoln.

O sat there another moment before getting up and crossing the cave floor to sit next to @severitysoftly. The others were going a bit deeper into the cave to watch out for reapers, but Jackson had a toner, so O wasn't worried about it being just her and him right now. Sitting down beside him, she pulled her knees up to her, and looked at the door once more. "Thank you for coming," she told him, knowing that he wasn't a fighter or trained. He could have waited back with the others but he came. She was glad that he did and she wasn't waiting alone.

[Deleted]

Jackson wasn't sure it was wise that he was here. Abby had approved it, but with Abby also at Mount Weather, Jackson feared the camp could wind up doctor-less should both of them get injured or die. But they'd decided they needed all boots on the ground in Mount Weather, even people who weren't normally fighters, and Jackson knew Octavia was scared for her brother. Even if she didn't show it. Jackson was scared for Abby, and she wasn't even a blood relative.

Jackson wasn't sure he fully understood Octavia. How could someone understand someone who'd practically lived under a floor for sixteen years? But it made sense to him that someone like her wouldn't embrace the culture that hid her away and locked her up, but rather embrace another culture, and Jackson had grown quite fond of her over the couple weeks since Lincoln's death. He wished he could heal the wounds that death had caused, but it wasn't something a surgery or a pill could ever take away. So he'd just made himself available to her when he could.

He glanced over at her when she sat next to him, and just nodded at her thanks. He'd been told to come to the Mountain, but he'd followed Octavia on purpose so he could be there for her. He didn't know Indra well, but she wasn't exactly the nurturing type. He rested his hand on top of her knee briefly. "He'll be okay," he told her. "He's strong." He hoped his words would not be proven false. Octavia didn't need to lose her boyfriend and her brother in such a short span of time. "Is the plan just to wait?"

Tag: blake

[blake]

Octavia Blake

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Don't make me wait forever.

---

Jackson put his hand on her knee, and she was grateful for the support. Right now she was facing loosing her brother--who had served as more then just the role of brother for her. She never knew a father, or had a friend. Bellamy had been all three for her in a way. She couldn't loose him. Not to this. She didn't like that they hadn't heard from him in a while and that the door wasn't opened yet. But O wasn't going to leave him. She'd wait forever if she needed too. He haven't given up on her, and she wasn't going to give up on him.

"Yeah, we wait until he gets it opened." She replied, looking at the door then to him. "He said he could free the grounders in there, and we could get everyone out this way, while Clarke and Lexa keep their attention on the front door." It had to work! If not then Bellamy was trapped in there and she might never get to him! O looked at the door once more, before looking at the cave wall before her. A warrior doesn't worry about things out of their control--but with Bellamy she didn't think she could turn it off. "Do you think it will work?" Jackson was smart, surly he wouldn't just do a plan if he thought it was a bad idea.

[Deleted]

"Yeah, I think it'll work," Jackson said. She was definitely worried about Bellamy if she was seeking his reassurance. Jackson didn't know Bellamy as well as he knew Octavia, but one of the first stories anyone ever told him about Bellamy had been when he'd treated a girl from Factory Station that Bellamy had dangled himself off a cliff to save. Jackson didn't have any reason to think Bellamy couldn't do what he said he'd do.

"Distraction is a good plan. They probably don't know we have a toner, so they won't be looking down here. They'll think the mines are too dangerous for us," Jackson said. He just hoped the same could be said for Raven and Wick. Once they cut power, the Mountain Men would be looking for them. They would need to get out fast.

Tag: blake

[blake]

Octavia Blake

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Don't make me wait forever.

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His words made her feel a bit better. He thought it would work too, which was something. She looked back up at him, still surprised that he was there with her. Not surprised by his actions, because int he time that she had started to get to know Jackson, she had learned that he was a good man,and was loyal to his friends. She knew that if he could help anyone he would do it. But more surprised that anyone was really with her. For so long Bellamy had been all she had. Having Jackson here was a new feeling.

"On the Ark . . . " She begun, but trailed off and looked away. "On the Ark the only people I knew were my mother and Bellamy. They floated her--" she paused, not wanting the bitterness to be aimed at him, "--for having me. Bellamy was all I had left." She couldn't loose him. Not after her mother and Lincoln. With that thought, she looked back at Jackson and knew that he was risking his life here too. If he died, she she would have really lost everything. "Where is your family?" She had not really asked him that before. There hadn't been time with hos fast everything was moving, and the bombing of TonDC. Was his mother back at camp? Or had the Ark floated her too?

[Deleted]

Jackson nodded as Octavia started to talk about her family. He was aware of what had happened to her, and he knew that was why this was so important to her. Bellamy wasn't just her brother, he was all she had. Jackson understood. Most of the time, he felt like all he had was Abby.

He sucked in a slow breath when she asked about his family. He never really talked about it. Abby knew. But the memories were still painful. They weren't fresh anymore, but his chest ached at them. His mother's death was part of why he'd closed himself off from forming close bonds with most people over the years. Abby has slipped past his defenses, though. And now it seemed like Octavia was doing the same. He wasn't sure why he felt that way. Maybe she was just different from anyone he'd ever known before.

"I never knew my dad," he told her. "I don't know anything about him. My mother... she got sick and passed away when I was thirteen." Jackson couldn't quite look at Octavia as he spoke about this. His mother had died in his arms. Jackson would never forget the agony of clinging to his mother's body as a child, wishing there was something, anything, he could do. He would never forget the feeling of emptiness at being assigned a strange bed in the Ark orphanage by an Ark official that seemed indifferent to him. "That's when I realized I wanted to be a doctor, though."

Tag: blake

[blake]

Octavia Blake

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Don't make me wait forever.

---

O watched him as he talked about his family, and she felt a little guilty for asking. He looked away from her as he spoke about his mother, and she reached her hand out to take his in her own. For a doctor he had strong hands. Or did all of them have strong hands? The warmth was comforting, and she hoped he took comfort from it too. O hadn't thought about a lot of boys this way. Well, men either. Finn had been cute, but then Jasper had saved her life and she had kissed him once. Though Atom had turned her head right after. They hadn't been anything compared to Lincoln though. He had been something else. Something strong and untouchable. .... not untouchable. Nothing was down here. Which was why she felt protective over Jackson. She could feel herself more willing to open up and talk to him, and she didn't want to loose him.

"I'm sorry," she said, when he finished talking about his mother. She knew how it felt to loose a mother. It was the worst feeling she had had up til that point in her life. "I never knew my father either. Don't even know who he is." Which made her understand how much his mother meant to him. With you only had one parent, you had something special there. Stronger. "I think she would like you saving people like you do. I didn't know her, but I think any mother would be proud to have you as a son."

[Deleted]

Jackson was surprised when Octavia took his hand. Aside from Abby, he wasn't used to this sort of casual affection or support. He was usually the one offering it, not receiving it. He closed his fingers around Octavia's anyway, grateful for the contact he almost always craved. He gave her hand a gentle squeeze, just shaking his head at her apology. It was so long ago.

"I think she would have been too," he said, when Octavia finished. After a moment, he huffed a small laugh. "I think she would have been a little shocked as well. We weren't exactly privileged growing up on Farm. That her son would become a doctor and an Officer..." He shook his head, giving her a small smile. His chest was still aching talking about her, but it somehow felt okay to talk about this with Octavia. "You mother would probably be proud of you too. You save people too."

Tag: blake

[blake]

Octavia Blake

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Don't make me wait forever.

---

He wrapped his fingers around her's and spoke of where he was from. "I've never seen a farm." She admitted, "What are they life?" She really did want to know, but she also asked to help distract her from the worry of waiting for her brother. Learning more about Jackson was about all that would distract her right now.

He had also spoken of her mother. "My mother wasn't really about saving people," Octavia admitted to him, "Family was first for her. She didn't worry about everyone else until we'd taken care of ourselves, first." That sounded selfish, but it was what they knew. Bellamy would always come first for her. He was her brother. She knew that she'd give everything up, right now, if it meant that she could help him get out of there. Some things were harder to give up then others--Jackson would be damn hard. She was glad that wasn't a choice she had to make.

[Deleted]

Jackson glanced over at Octavia as she talked about her family. He supposed that living like she had, her mother would have had to be like she was. "She was saving you guys, then," he said. "And I would guess she'd be proud of how strong you are."

He squeezed her hand and leaned his head back against the wall he was leaning against. He suspected Octavia was trying to distract herself from her worry. Jackson had patients sometimes that wanted him to talk about literally anything but what he was doing to them for their treatment. So Jackson started to answer her question about farms with the intention of doing the same for her. "They're nothing like Earth farms on the Ark. I would think a farm on Earth would be beautiful. Everything growing from the ground, straining for the sun... On the Ark everything was so sterile. Rows of plants in containers, some with synthetic soil, others just growing in water. Rows of lamps above them set on timers to mimic the sunlight as much as we could. The gardens were locked, to keep people from stealing food or medicine, but I saw them a couple times with my mom. thought it was amazing then, but now that I've seen earth, the way things grow down here, the Ark gardens just seemed cold now."

Tag: blake

[blake]

Octavia Blake

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Don't make me wait forever.

---

O didn't know if her mother would be proud of her or not. Aurora wasn't a 'save everyone' person, she had done things, and put others at risk to protect her family. She fought and gave up parts of herself in order to have this family. And now, O was sitting outside a door, waiting for her Brother to MAYBE be alright enough to open it, because he went into a stronghold full of enemies to save everyone--and she'd let him go alone. She shifted slightly, wishing she could go back and have followed him in. They would have been alright as long as they were together.

Jackson's talking help distract her from thinking about her brother, as he was describing farms on the Ark. She hadn't seen much of the Ark. Her room and her cell. For a day she had seen a dance, and the medical bay, but then it was back to lock up. She had never been able to run, or see in the distance. She wanted to see the farms that Jackson was describing on the ground. She wanted to be able to do that with him. She wanted Bellamy there! "I'd like to see that." She admitted, "When this is over, I'd like to see the farms grow." Do do something, to build something. "Do you think we will have peace?" Kane seemed certain of it, but he also seemed to think sending a bunch of kids to the ground was a good idea, so she didn't put a lot of stock in what he said. Jackson would be honest with her. She wanted to know what he thought.

She wondered what he would do with peace. Doctors helped the sick, but were there a lot of sick? She didn't know. Not too many had gotten sick around her so she wasn't sure the leveled of need there was about a doctor. Her mother had also given birth to her, alone and without a doctor, so she didn't think about women needing them either. Her fingers brushed over the back of his hand, as she held it while thinking. They could be friends. They could maybe even be more then friends?

[Deleted]

Jackson was thinking they probably should farm in their camp after this was over, if peace ever held long enough for it to happen when Octavia asked if he thought they would ever have peace. "I don't know," he answered honestly, squeezing her hand again. He turned his head to look at her. "I hope we will, though. If I give up hope, what else is there?"

Jackson felt isolated on Earth, just as he had on the Ark. he was starting to feel less so, now that he'd let Octavia in a little. Still, without hope, this life would just be a backbreaking slog through pain and war. Without hope, it would be too easy to give up.

Tag: blake