Bring me home

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iah

He’s been banished for several years now. It’s been too young. Roan had long since forgotten how his life was with a home. Well, of course he still knew how it had been, but places changed, people changed, rules changed and he simply missed home, community. He missed being able to go somewhere and not fear for someone taking his life as he was banished, technically from the lands of the twelve clans, which didn’t leave him much room on where he would go. Most of the time he was around Trikru, Glowing tree and Azgeda lands, hiding in plain sight even, which happened to me the best hiding spot he found. 

There was a feast in Azgeda, which was why he was able to easily sneak into the capital. He was hidden under a cloak, limping for good measure, dirt on his face. A beggar was an easy distraction, because who looked twice at those? Hidden among the crowd, his destination was clear. He wanted home. And he had – or used to have – good friends in high positions. He had hope in one person, like his mother, just for different reasons. As the feast caused noises and distractions, Roan slipped into a place he never expected to see again, but then again this was risking his life. He had to try though. He waited in the shadow, knowing not to drop his disguise just yet. He needed to find Ontari first. 

The wait wasn’t long. As she passed, all pride and knowledge of what she could achieve, he moved forward, limping. Holding his hand out, a scar she once gave him all to visible. “Do you have water for an old wounded beggar?”

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It was the day of the feast and Ontari, below her mask of confidence, felt the small amount of worry that she always did at times when she would be out among large crowds. Nia had well drilled into her that she was to always be careful about keeping her identity secret. Hidden among the many warriors in Nia's court whom were there to protect the royals, Ontari had kept herself well hidden all the years she had lived there. The times where she had slipped up had been few and far between, no more people than the fingers on one hand had ever found out about the colour of her blood. They had been killed right away. It was always on days like the one that was happening then where it happened and so Ontari never felt quite comfortable when she left the protection of the palace's private rooms to play her part in the public festivals meant to give Azgeda a sense of community. And so, as she walked through towards the doors of the palace, she found herself not on guard as she should of been. Worry clouded her mind and she took advantage of those last few moments before she would have to be on her best guard and best behaviour to prepare. While there were guards at the door, with the crowds that had gathered it shouldn't have been a surprise to Ontari that someone could have made it through those doors still. She was sure if she asked around she would find out it hadn't even been the first time for something like that to happen. Still, when the beggar's spoke from the shadows, Ontari turned in surprise, a knife pulled out and aimed at the stranger before she could even think. Instinct taking over in her own reaction, attacking where others might jump or scream. Lucky for him, however, she didn't harm the man in her shock. The knife was held out, centimeters from where the beggar held out his hand. Ontari looked at the man, taking in the dirt on his face, the cloak covering his frame. As he stood in the shadows, she couldn't see much more than that. It was quite obvious to Ontari that the man was not meant to be where he was. "You aren't supposed to be in here," she told him. Realising he wasn't likely to be a threat, she put the knife back where she had it hidden at her waist. It was then that she looked down at his outstretched hand, something about it catching her attention. A scar. Her eyes widened, the memory of it and how she had caused it clear as day. Her eyes moved to the man's face, now recognising it below the cloak. It was Roan. "What are you doing here?" she hissed. Her hand moved to take her knife back out. ash || Well, I can't say she's happy to see him.

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His disguise was good, it seemed. His disguised being a dirty beggar. Who would have expected that of a prince? Not many, naturally. But that was, what he was been forced to become. He was a beggar now, banished from the land of his people, of his father. He ahd not even been given the chance to properly say goodbye, couldn't bare to even attempt to say goodbye to Ontari back then. The idea of leaving her, leaving all of them was jsut to painful for him to bear. Finally she noticed him, recognized him. Ontari pulled out the knife again and he couldnt blame her. Not just because if someone would recognize her, they would expect her to do what his sentence would require her to do: Kill him, end his life because he was tresspassing on lands that were no longer his. But he wanted to come home. He was tired. 

"Ontari, I can explain." Not jsut his appearance but why he left without a word, without ever saying goodbye to her. It was done. He could not take it back. "I need your help." That alone was gutsy to say. She would probably expect the worse, and not without good reason. He was banished and left without a word. People could expect him to be pissed at his mother, but he was a lot more pissed at Lexa than his mother. Still he wanted to come home, but he was in no position to do this on his own. Ontari, though, was in the position to help him. "I am sick of this. I want to come home. But I need your help."

iah

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There was nothing but anger in Ontari at the sight of Roan. How could she feel anything else? Roan was standing in front of her. This meant that Roan had not only broken his banishment by being in Azgeda, the land of one of the clans, but had also decided that she would be the best person to go to. Ontari could not understand how he thought that he could explain this. How could he explain doing such a stupid thing? The last thing that Ontari wanted was to be the person to kill him but if someone were to see him there, in the palace of Azgeda, talking to her, she would have no choice but to kill him or risk being killed herself. Where as she hoped that her blood made her special enough for Nia to not give that order, Lexa would be completely different in opinion. Lexa wasn't keeping Ontari as a secret weapon. "Then explain," she ordered him. Ontari kept the knife gripped in her hand, the blade pointed in Roan's direction. While she was not quite prepared to use it then, the words that came from Roan's lips might change her mind quite quickly. She wasn't sure what to hope for him to say. He needed her help. Of course, that was what she should have expected. Why else would Roan, the prince who left for banishment without even a goodbye, want anything from Ontari but help. Ontari could do nothing but glare at Roan for his words. She began to wonder what sort of help he might be looking for. Did he want revenge on his mother, on Nia? If that was what he wanted, Ontari would be torn on what to do. She didn't want to be responsible for the deaths of either Nia or her son Roan. They had taken her in as a child, they had raised her a strong warrior and protected her from Lexa. Well, that was what she had been brought up to think. There were times where Ontari had trouble seeing the positive side of her upbringing, times where she couldn't bare another day under the horrible arms of the Queen Nia. But, alas, Ontari didn't feel that she would ever want to kill Nia. And so, as her main suspicion of what Roan would want her help with, Ontari already felt the words of disagreement on her tongue. "What are you sick of?" Ontari asked, her emotions on her tongue for Roan to see. "Are you sick of the banishment you brought on yourself?" It was obvious that Roan would not have been banished for anything but a good reason. It was obvious that he was banished from the land of the twelve clans because he had done something that made him a danger to all. Ontari's hand moved closer to Roan, bring the knife up to his throat. It sat only a small distance from the vulnerable skin that could lead to his kick death. But Ontari could not find it in herself to kill him in that moment. She knew why and she hated it. There were still feelings that she held for him, pieces of their past growing up together and being arranged to marry and become rulers of Azgeda together. Pieces of the fact that Ontari had fallen for the prince. Her hand shook, so slightly that it could hardly be seen. While she didn't move her hand to remove the knife from where it hovered in front of Roan's neck, she felt herself relax slightly, her emotions taking control. "Why did you have to come here? Why to me?" Her voice managed to stay steady on the words and she put her energy into replacing the mask that she always tried to wear. ash || These two! (:

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Banishment he caused himself? Was that the story they told here? He shouldn't be surprised. He had grown up here after all and that, was just like Azgeda would react to the news of the banishment of a prince. Of course it would have to be his own fault. But Roan knew better by now. It wasn't all as black and white as it seemed. A lot of politics were involved, politics which hung like a sword of damocles above him, threatening his demise if he did not behave according to the rules set by two people. He couldn't even be here, technically.

"Lexa has started it. It wasn't unclever, either. Banish the heir to control a queen." He would have guessed his mother would have thought of the same tactic, had she needed it. In the end, he was the one that suffered from it. And she was the one that could help him. "Which is why I am here. I need your help to get Lexa to let me go back." It was the best chance he had to trust Ontari. He didn't think more had to be done. There were but few obstacles and he was sure with Ontaris mind and her help, they could be overcome - even if it meant making his family defy her. But they had defied her before.  "I came to you because you are the only person I know who might be able to do this with me. Who can sway Lexas decision into letting me come back." Or start rolling the stone that might end up in him returning.



iah

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Maybe Ontari shouldn't have been surprised to hear that the reason for Roan's banishment was actually Lexa. That could almost be expected, knowing the fact that Lexa and Nia were basically enemies. Still, Ontari didn't know if she could just believe him there and then. He had disappeared still, left her without any sort of explanation of why apart from her hearing that he had been banished for some unknown reason. He had always been a little too confident in himself, a little bit too strong. Ontari had just assumed he had done something stupid, a crime that couldn't be ignored even if he was a prince or something that would endanger Azgeda in some way. She had definitely put thought into it being political but still, had thought that it must have been his fault rather than something that he was forced to do because of Lexa. It could have been the truth or it could have been a lie. Ontari wouldn't know either way yet. Ontari laughed, not genuine laughter, it was dry and humorless. It was almost cute how Roan thought she would be able to help him somehow convince Lexa to allow him out of his banishment. How was she supposed to do that? She wasn't heda and she wasn't anyone close to Lexa. If she went to talk with Lexa she could imagine it ending with one of them dead and while Ontari would hope that she would be the stronger warrior, she didn't know if she was. It could easily be a suicide mission trying to kill Lexa. She couldn't imagine Nia being happy with that idea, either. It wasn't that Ontari personally cared for what Nia liked or not, it's that she had no choice. Nia was her queen and Ontari was her prized warrior. "How am I supposed to convince Lexa of anything?" Ontari asked, her knife still at Roan's throat. "I'm sure there are better people you could go ask for help," she then spat at him, anger again bubbling to the surface. She pushed the knife forward, just enough to cause a drop of blood to appear on his neck, not actually injuring him. It was a warning. ash

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"You're the only one I trust." Or trusted. He wasn't sure if he still could. People changed. Everyone changed and he was sure he had changed, too. Banishment easily changed people. In many ways he was very disillusioned. He knew what the loyalty of his mother looked like. He knew that she was a queen first, but now he knew that his own mother had no problems throwing him out to remain the queen undisputed. That was not only a wake up call to him, he reevaluated more than that. But Ontari had always been true in one form or another. That he could appreciate. 

"You are close to my mother." He pointed out. And that was the one reason why he thought she could help more than anyone else. She was close to his mother. She could pull it off. "All we have to do is, to convince her, that me being banished or not makes no difference to my mother. And we both know it doesn't. Lexa would see you only as close to mother. Other than that..." Other than that her role should not be revealed, because if the commander knew, nobody knew what she would do to her. He expected the worst, not only from Lexa. 

iah

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Ontari's scowl didn't leave her face at Roan confessing she was the only person he trusted. He may have trusted her but she did not trust him. Not anymore. There had definitely been a time when Ontari had trusted Roan. They had grown up together, trained together and, well, Ontari had even thought that she may have felt something more towards the prince. Still now as she looked at him, the way her emotions came up so strongly, the way she knew she couldn't actually kill him even as she held a blade to his throat. Drawing the drop of blood as she had was the most she would manage, the most damage she could make to the man who she thought she had lost for good. Even in her anger. She didn't trust him but some part of her still cared for him with old, outdated feelings. "Maybe you need to find other people then," she told him, not letting her words echo the way part of her felt. Letting it echo her anger and her distrust, the most of her that wanted nothing to do with him after disappearing without a word. Then finally Roan set out what his plan was. Ontari listened, as much as she knew she shouldn't. This had already gone so much further than it should have been allowed to. Roan should have been made to leave again or he should have been killed. Neither of those had yet happened. It only made Ontari feel weak. Roan was presenting himself in a way that was a weakness to Ontari. There was nothing in the world that should have been able to make her question such a simple judgement. Kill him. Force him to leave. Give him to the Queen's guard. All of those would have been acceptable but yet, she was here doing the one thing she shouldn't have been doing: talking to him. "I'm close to Nia," Ontari agreed, continuing with the conversation and continuing to ignore the decision she should have been making. "But in who's world is the Heda so dumb? It will breathe like your mother coming up with a plan to get you back." Ontari being close to Nia in the way she was would not help in their plan. Any strong Heda would not believe someone in a position as hers in a matter so personal and important. ash

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"Well she was not overly clever either." Roan pointed out. It would all stand and fall with what Lexa decided. But it was worth a shot. It was a question of how much she would come to trust Ontari. It was a question of how well she could act and he knew she had been trained to act certain ways, simply because she had to hide her true identity. He knew if anyone could pull that off, it would be Ontari. And he knew that with her, they could come up with an idea, if she was willing to give him a chance and would help him. Lexa was but a girl, too. She was, just like any other person, except for her role. With the right deception, or well arguments, he was sure they could persuade her to let him back. 

"Ontari, if anyone can come up with a plan that might work, it is you. If you don't think it will work, we can alter it. Just.... I am sick of this life. I am sick of running whenever I am close to people. Trust me, goats aren't good companions." Especially not when they were prone to give him away, stupid things they were. And then there were those poisonous or venomous animals out there. He was sick and tired of all of it. "Ontari, there is not a day that passed that I didn't wish I could have gone home or parted in a different way. You... out of all the people here, are the only one with the brain to be able to help me."

iah

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As much as Ontari hated to admit it, Roan was right in one respect: Lexa's plan hadn't been smart. She hadn't been clever in the banishment of Roan, if that even was what happened. Ontari still didn't know if she could quite believe the story that Roan was feeding her. Before the banishment she would believe every word that came from Roan's lips but now, she was having trouble believing anything. Roan would want her to believe him to help him in getting out of his banishment. Her on his side would help him, although likely less than he thought it would. His words came out with totally faith in her, in her ability to come up with some amazing plan that would allow him to be free again. Ontari didn't hold that same hope in herself. It looked like that, from the outside, a necessity when it came to her current and future positions but she much trouble believing she was actually good enough. And this situation was no exception in that fact. Her scowl came back strong, although her actions showed a different emotion. She dropped the blade from his neck, replacing it at her belt. A decision had been made and Ontari wasn't going to kill him. She couldn't. And while she hadn't decided about the other options, about asking him to leave or giving him over to the Queen's guard, she had another decision to make that was more time pressing. If someone else saw him there, if someone else recognised him, all decision would be taken out of Ontari's hands. They had to move somewhere less public. "I don't know if any plan will work," Ontari said bluntly, drawing all emotion out of her voice as she said it. The emotion that wanted a plan to work, that wanted Roan back. "But we can't do this here," she then added. Without any more words, Ontari grabbed hold of Roan's forearm, pulling him through the edge of the room to a door that led deeper into the palace. It wouldn't be too difficult to find somewhere private to talk, as much as Ontari's heart was beating harder in her chest, nerves threatening to push through her calm demeanour. ash

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Roan followed the girl into the other room. There were so many rooms, it wasn’t hard to find one unoccupied. He still kept the hood on, still kept himself hidden, for other reasons. He was no longer the same man he had been and he was well aware of it. While in Azgeda apart from winter he was always well fed, well trained. Now the training was harsher, bordering on too much. His face hs grown harder, his features. His hair was longer, less bright as he hadn’t taken care of that in ages. There were fresh and deep scars upon his body. But deep down he was still the same man. Just changed by experiences. Roan leaned against the wall, arms crossed in front of him.

“I know it will be hard.” He said. “I know a different story has been spread here. Which is it? Did I run off?” He asked her. He had heard that while being out as well. He heard many assumptions on where he was and why he was not in Azgeda. “Ontari, where do I stand in Azgeda? What do they think of their prince?” Did they know the reason they could kill the prince was Lexa? Did they know any of that? “What were you told?” It was just as important to him as his people. He had to know to know how to deal with this. “Ontari… I just want to return home. Hell, I don’t even care if I’m no longer prince. I’m sick of having to run all the time.”

iah

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It wasn't difficult to find a quiet room, a place they could talk without the fear of someone recognising Roan. Once they had found that room, Ontari was sure to have the door closed, to do a quick sweep of the room with her eyes and check for any other entrances. It wasn't easy to keep track of all the rooms that the palace held, and Ontari didn't have the knowledge she probably should have had about the building, so she would rather be safe than sorry about this. Once she was sure that it was clear, that herself and Roan would be safe and alone, her body relaxed. Enough that it must have looked obvious. But still, there was some tension in her body, fueled by the part of her that couldn't quite believe what Roan was telling her. The part of her that had grown to believe that Roan was the bad guy and that he wasn't the man she had once grown feelings towards. Ontari watched as Roan leaned against a wall, his hood still up, shading most of him from her view, even though they were safe from the prying eyes of others. "You don't have to keep that on," she said, with a shrug. Either way, Ontari didn't care too much but it would probably make them both feel a little more comfortable if they were more open. It might help Ontari to feel better about the decisions she was making, like the one not to kill him. Might even make her feel more confident about believing him when so much of her found that so difficult. At least this next thing he said was believable. "Hard is an understatement," Ontari said, the words muttered and Ontari's tone bitter. Getting Roan cleared, getting him to a point where he could yet again live in the open and live in Azgeda--Ontari's head hurt trying to think of how it could work. She wasn't a master plan-maker, wasn't good at strategy, as all the planning was done by Nia and she was just to follow those plans. A snort from Ontari followed Roan's question. There were many stories that went around Azgeda. Ontari overheard different versions of Roan's disappearance from people at the markets and in the Queen's guard, everything from him being some master criminal against his own mother to him having just run away from his responsibilities. No one was really sure about what had happened, but Ontari had at least gotten the fact that he had been banished, for some crime she had taken to assume. "They don't know what to think of their prince," Ontari finally said, keeping her voice even, still doing her best to keep emotion out of it. "You've run away or you're a criminal, but either way, I don't think anyone trusts you now." Obviously, Ontari couldn't be completely sure of that. For all she knew, the people would still trust Roan, especially when the other choice was Nia. Being close to Nia, even Ontari felt that a criminal Roan would likely be more trustworthy as a leader. But she wouldn't admit to that. Even in the silence and safety of the room, if she were overheard saying something of that...Ontari sometimes wondered if it were possible to push her limits too far, to a point where Nia would kill her. "You're a criminal. Banished. That's all I knew." His words sounded truthful, in the ways that Ontari remembered from when they were younger. It was hard to think that he was lying in saying he wanted to return home. That he didn't even care about his position as the prince. "Look," she began, "I really don't know if I can help you in this...but I'll try." Ontari knew that once she said that, she wouldn't back down from it. It wasn't always her thing to stick to her word but she felt like she owed Roan that much. From their past. More as an afterthought, Ontari muttered, "I missed you."  ash || Woooooow, Ontari's human?

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“I am a criminal.” Roan pointed out. “Banishment automatically pronounces you a criminal.” He said. And it pronounced him as someone they could kill. It was his lot in life it seemed. From prince to criminal, someone they hunted. He had run into people who were willing to do just that before. It was a horrible fate in his eyes. But it was nothing. Nothing to the woman who cast this on him, those who let this happen to exact control where no control could be had. There was no way anyone could gain control over someone who viewed themselves as this powerful. 

“In political games like this, it matters little if anyone is truly innocent or not. My worst crime is the blood running through my veins.” It was a weird connection actually. For her, her blood what brought her to his mothers attention, which gave her this elevated yet secret she seemed to thrive in. And yet what she said was the last thing he expected. He thought he might persuade her to help him, but he never dared to hope she’d have missed him. Yet here she was. It was a strange feeling blooming in his chest, warmth, burning like a fire he thought no longer existant. Yet here it was, a tiny flicker of the flame of hope. A dangerous thing to have in his position. For himself and others. With his training, her position and their combined determination, they could make a powerful enemy. “I missed you, too.” He knew it meant a lot less coming from him, to her probably. He was always a tad more open with that kind of thing. Just then he had a thought. Maybe that was what they could pry on. If she missed him, others might, too. Others might want the prince back. This was a game of power and control.

“What if we give them no choice?” He offered. “There are a few, Ontari, that want me as their prince, that put their hope in me. All we might have to do is spark the fire of rebellion. They banished me to gain control over my mother – useless, as you know – maybe they reinstate me to gain control over the masses. One spark to ignite a fire, Ontari, that might be all we need. Or we kill Lexa."

iah