Don't Fear The Ex-Reaper

[Deleted]

Weariness wasn't something Jackson wasn't used to, but the demands on him felt different on Earth. More chaotic. They'd barely touched down and gotten medical set up when Jackson had had to operate on his first patient without anesthesia. Raven's screams featured prominently in his dreams for a few nights after that.

But he was starting to settle into this new world. It was hard and dangerous and Jackson rarely rested, but he had a job to do. Jackson couldn't rest as long as people needed his help.

Jackson stood over Lincoln, taking his vitals for the last time that day, as Octavia hovered. Jackson had seen Octavia in camp briefly, but never spoken to her, really. He knew who she was, and he knew her brother. What he didn't know was that Octavia was in love with a Grounder. Jackson didn't have any particular prejudice toward anyone, as long as they weren't hostile, and Lincoln seemed anything but, in spite of having just been addicted to a drug that had made him not himself. Regardless of his own lack of prejudices, though, this type of relationship between a Sky Person and a Grounder was something he hadn't seen before.

"Make him rest," he told Octavia, then headed out to get something to eat in this brief moment of downtime. He debated finding himself a table alone to sit and clear his head at, but the more he thought about Octavia and Lincoln, the more interested he became. And Octavia hadn't left Lincoln, so she probably needed to eat too.

By the time Jackson got back to medical, Lincoln was asleep, and Octavia was sitting in a chair across the room. Jackson walked over and held out the second plate of food. "You should rest too," he said quietly, not wanting to wake Lincoln. "But at least eat if you won't."



blake

[blake]

Octavia Blake

---

After what they did to me?
I say float them all.

---

O wasn't planning on leaving LIncoln's side for anything right now. She had thought him dead, and the loss had been too much. There wasn't many people in her life that she loved, and the loss of her mother had drastically altered her . . . she wasn't strong enough to loss another. Thankfully, she had not lost Lincoln this time, and Clarke's mom had helped him. She'd shocked him back to life. Now they were in the fall bits of the Ark and she was waiting for him to get strong enough to come back. The other doctor was walking around, but O didn't know him. She might have bene born on the Ark but she didn't know who was who or what they did or how important they were. This place was full of the people who would have killed her. Who did kill her mother.

The bitterness wasn't strong like it used to be. She understood that she had to get past all that in order for everyone to survive, but she also didn't feel like she belonged. This was the people that her brother belonged too; and Lincoln belonged to another group--she didn't know which one she belonged too, but she wanted to belong with Lincoln.

The doctor guy left, but when he came back he had food. O looked at the offer for a moment, surprised that he would be nice to her. Reaching for it, her eyes finally moved to his face, and O wondered why he was doing it. "Thanks," She said on a low voice. She was hungry. Noticing that he had too plates, and as Lincoln was sleeping she could assumed he meant to join her. "I can't sleep, so I might as well stay here. I don't want him to wake up alone here." Not that she thought anyone would hurt him, but Lincoln was tired out, and he didn't know anyone here either. She didn't want him to be alone like that.

[Deleted]

Jackson nodded. "I can understand that," he said. He looked over at Lincoln's sleeping form. Jackson didn't know anything about the other man, other than what he'd just been through. He didn't know how the other Sky People felt about a Grounder in their camp. "I'll probably be here most of the night, so he wouldn't be alone, but no one ever likes to wake up in medical and not have a familiar face nearby."

He gestured at a chair a few feet from Octavia. "Mind if I join you? Or do you need time alone?" If Octavia didn't want him to stay, that was fine. There was work he could do at his desk while he ate.

[blake]

Octavia Blake

---

After what they did to me?
I say float them all.

---

He made a fair point, and asked to join her. Octavia wasn't used to talking to everyone here. Mostly they looked at her in some sort of confusion or fear. Either it was the fact that she was a sister, or the fact that she had 'switched sides'. Someone being nice to her almost made her revert to her old self and say something snarky before sending him away. Right now however, he was Lincoln's best hope of recovering. Besides, he didn't look at her like she was a freak. "Sure," she said, reaching for her plate and moving it to prop on the edge of Lincoln's bed, as a makeshift table; before pulling a bit of it off and eating it.

Everyone knew her name by now, mostly because they talked about her; but she didn't know everyone else. They had said his name before but she had been only thinking of Lincoln. "I don't know your name." She admitted softly, but unapologetic. She would never apologize to one of them. Even if they were doctors with kind eyes and were trying to help. "I'm Octavia," she told him, knowing he knew but wanting to say it anyway.

The bitterness was always something she struggled with. On one hand, these were her mother's people and her brother's friends. On the other, they had been the reason she had been locked up for 16 years until they found her--and then they locked her up for another year, before sending her to Earth to die. The only people she considered her's right now where the others she was sent down with. Even then, most of them though she was a freak too.

[Deleted]

Jackson wasn't surprised Octavia didn't know his name. A lot of people didn't, as Jackson tended to be stuck in medical all the time. And in his rare moments of free time, he kept to himself a lot. "Nice to finally meet you. Though I wish the circumstances were better," he said, taking the seat near hers. He always wished the circumstances were better these days. She probably knew people talked in camp, and Jackson sometimes got gossiped at by patients. But he didn't want her to feel self-conscious by what he'd just said, so he added, "I know your brother."

He gave her a small smile, and said, "I'm Jackson." He looked over at Lincoln's sleeping form as he took a bite of his food, chewing thoughtfully for a moment. "How did you two meet?" he asked after a moment, gesturing at Lincoln with his fork. His tone was genuinely curious.

Tag: blake

[blake]

Octavia Blake

---

After what they did to me?
I say float them all.

---

"Nice to finally meet you. Though I wish the circumstances were better," Fair enough, this wasn't exactly the way to meet someone, but for O there wasn't much else. She could almost play out the whole conversation. Oh your the younger Blake one, the one hidden under the floor for 16 years. "I know your brother." Octavia looked down at her food and didn't say anything to that. She loved her brother, and was proud to be his sister, but hearing people tell her that he knew him was hard sometimes. He had been her whole world, but he had made other friends and had a life outside the four walls that she knew.

He smiled at her, and she thought his face look friendly. Not curious or judgmental like she had come to expect. Not that she was the victim here. O knew she played it up to keep a distance between her and the others. "I'm Jackson." His eyes moved to Lincoln, and O almost braced herself. "How did you two meet?" Smiling she visually relaxed. O knew she was being hard on him, and he seemed nice. He wasn't looking at Lincoln like he was a dangerous animal. It helped. A lot.

Shifting in her chair, she sat back to better be able to have the conversation and still see her lover. "We'd not been on the ground long, when I got separated from my brother." Why they were alone was a story she wouldn't get into. "He saved me. Kept me alive." Though at first she hadn't known it or been grateful. "He kept a lot of us alive." Even after her brother beat on him for hours. Even after Raven shocked him. "They aren't all bad." O told him, knowing that was how many saw the grounders. And she was coming to realize that not all Arkers where bad too. He was decent enough.

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Jackson hadn't been quite sure how to approach asking about Octavia's relationship with Lincoln, but when she smiled and seemed to relax, he figured he had picked the right way. He listened as she explained, taking bites of his food. He'd saved her life, and apparently many of the rest of their lives. When she finished, her last words caught his attention. They aren't all bad.

He looked back over at her, then inclined his head thoughtfully before looking back at his plate. "I mostly only know what I hear," he started. "And I haven't been on the ground long." Long enough that his bones felt heavy, like he could fall asleep sitting here if he closed his eyes. "But I tend not to believe generalizations." He looked back at her briefly. "And I always believe what I see with my own eyes," he added. And he could see how much Lincoln meant to Octavia. The girl may have grown up under a floor, but she didn't seem crazy.

Tag: blake

[blake]

Octavia Blake

---

After what they did to me?
I say float them all.

---

"I mostly only know what I hear," O could just imagine what that was. She had see the way the teenager that came down talking about; she couldn't wait to find out what their parents were saying. "And I haven't been on the ground long." Fair enough. She looked back up at him, and tried to decided on if she liked him or not. He was nice, and seemed to honestly mean his words.

"But I tend not to believe generalizations." Smart. "And I always believe what I see with my own eyes," Deciding then that she liked him, O smiled softly. He wasn't judging and she was grateful for that. She let the silence stretch for a long moment before she spoke again, "Thanks for the food." She told him, "and the company." It wasn't her asking him to leave, but more welcoming him to stay. "Not a lot of people around here are so opened minded." At least none she had really talked too.

[Deleted]

Jackson smiled when she thanked him for the food and the company. If he were honest, he needed the break himself. He wouldn't have taken it, though, if not for the excuse that he was taking care of Octavia right now. As much as he could. By making sure she ate and wasn't alone. "Sadly, that seems to be human nature," he commented when she finished.

He took another bite of his food, chewing thoughtfully. "We were so isolated up there," he said, tilting his head back to indicate he meant up on the Ark. "From anyone not like us. We locked people up and floated them when they didn't fit our idea of the way things should be," he added, glancing over at her, though his gaze held no judgment. They'd locked her up for her very existence. "And fear is so basic. It's easy to fear what you don't understand." It didn't excuse people's close mindedness, but it was easy to understand.

Tag: blake

[blake]

Octavia Blake

---

After what they did to me?
I say float them all.

---

"Sadly, that seems to be human nature," O could see that. She felt it every time she walked out of here, and she looked at her like she grown another head. "We were so isolated up there," That caused her softness to fade slowly. He felt isolated up there? Really? She didn't say anything, as she just watched him, and even though she came to see he meant from others, she still knew he could never understand what it was to be isolated. None of them did. Bellamy had an idea, but he didn't know. "And fear is so basic. It's easy to fear what you don't understand." That was true, too. But fear didn't have to make sure hate something.

Besides the Arkers should be afraid. If the grounders had a chance, they would remove all threats. Not that O blamed them. From where she had been raised, the only way she knew the Ark was the people who might kill her for being alive. The grounders at least would kill her for being a threat. "If we plan to stay alive down here, then they might want to get over that." It was easy for her to say that, she knew it was harder for it to happen. Looking at Lincoln she kept speaking, "Because there are bigger things out there then just us, and if we can't work together then we are all dead."

[Deleted]

Jackson took a bite of his food as she spoke, then nodded when she finished. "I agree," he told her. He'd been part o the bureaucracy on the Ark just by being an officer, and while he understood why certain rules existed, he didn't have to like them. He'd told Abby to defy Kane to Kane's face once, and he supposed he should feel lucky he wasn't floated for encouraging dissent toward the acting Chancellor at the time, but he'd never liked politics. There was no room for forgiveness or growth in them. Though Kane seemed to be growing out of his tendency to live or die by the rules lately, so time would tell.

"If we just keep to the pattern of violence, all that does is lead to mutually assured destruction." Jackson wasn't sure who would come out on top in the end. It would seem that a large group of trained warriors could have wiped out a hundred teenagers easily, but they hadn't. And now that parts of the Ark were down, they had more technology on their side. And more sophisticated weapons. They were hugely outnumbered, but they were still here. "I trust Abby, though. She doesn't want anyone else to die." Jackson didn't know what decision Abby would come to with Kane regarding handling their current threat after Finn's massacre, but he trusted she would try to ensure as few lives lost as possible.

Tag: blake

[blake]

Octavia Blake

---

After what they did to me?
I say float them all.

---

O sat there and took in his words, thinking about how he phrased it, and absorbing the deeper meaning behind the words. They would end up bringing each other down if they couldn't stop this bickering and fighting and work together. She knew the Arkers would never accept the Grounders but she respected their culture and values. She liked that they didn't think people weak because they were hidden under a floor, and made her earn everything. They had been the wildest things she had ever seen, and knowing that she could earn their respect had felt empowering.

But if the others didn't at least learn to work together, then this would be going no where.

Jackson added on that he trusted Abby, and O held back the comment that she didn't trust anyone. She trusted her brother, and she trusted Lincoln. She was growing to trust the Indra, but knew that this was her people and Indra would never fully trust a Skyperson. "I don't know anyone here enough to trust them, besides my brother and Clarke." Raven too, though O was still pissed that she shocked Lincoln. "My whole life I had to hide from everyone or watch my family die." and she just wanted to stop hiding. Never hide again. Never fear them again, but be feared instead. "I like it here better."

[Deleted]

Jackson knew he could never fully understand what Octavia had been through, but his only family, his mother, had died in his arms. And ever since then, he'd isolated himself. It wasn't the same as spending 16 years in a single unit, much of it under a floor. His isolation had been his own choice--an unconscious one at the time, but still a choice--and he had still moved freely around the Ark, interacting with people.

"I can see why you would," Jackson said when she finished. Life had been much easier for him on the Ark, for the most part anyway. Or had it been? Maybe it was just a different kind of struggle now. "I go back and forth on that, but for people like you, I'm happy." Happy was a relative term these days. "You know, I know a lot of you probably hated us for sending you down here. But there were never enough dropships for everyone. Had we sent volunteers, and found Earth to be survivable, they would not have even thought to put any of you on the other dropships. The first ship down was your only chance to live." It was how Jackson was able to sleep at night when working on Project Exodus, knowing they were sending children to Earth. The kids could have all died, but without sending them in the first dropship, they would have died in space anyway.

Tag: blake

[blake]

Octavia Blake

---

After what they did to me?
I say float them all.

---

He was happy for her? That was different. O wasn't sure how to take that, and she only just watched him. Not one beside Bellamy or MAYBE Clarke upon occasion had been happy for her. Even then it was mostly Clarke being so when it round about benefited her. She didn't blame Clarke for that, it was something she understood more then a stranger being happy for her. Her social skills weren't the best sometimes, and communicating wasn't what she was known for.

"To be fair, I hated you long before you sent me here to die." O admitted, but without heat or any really hate in her tone. It was just spoken matter of factly. "It's only recently that I stopped." She didn't hate them any longer, but she didn't want to be apart of them. They had never accepted her. She would never fit in here. Either she was a freak because she was a sister or because she was in grounder clothes. "But I get it. It worked out." They had to cut the population to let the others survive. Harsh but it made since.

It was then that she realized she had seen Jackson before. When she was arrested on the Ark, she had been giving some tests before being locked up. It had mostly been a girl doctor, Clarke's mom, but Jackson had been there too. She had been rather upset about her mother and hadn't overly paid attention to who was doing what. She blocked most of that out. O was sure she hadn't been very friendly, but she wasn't going to apologize now. "Besides, from what i gather about politics, it the choice of who to kill wasn't yours." It had been Jaha's. Kane's.

[Deleted]

Jackson glanced over at Octavia when she said she had hated them all long before the Ark had dropped her to the ground. It made sense, and there wasn't any judgment in his gaze, though. He could never fully understand what her life had been like, but he supposed if he'd been locked away for seventeen years, he'd be a much different person.

"It wasn't my choice, no," he agreed. "But I struggled with it. Until I realized what I just told you anyway." He took another bite of his food, watching Lincoln for a moment, He was still resting peacefully. "I helped with the wristbands, mostly. Monitored your vitals." he still remembered when he'd realized the kids had found water. It was the first time he'd felt any true hope since he started work on Project Exodus.

Tag: blake